He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
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