I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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