i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize