I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Randomize