All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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