I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
