So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
