So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Randomize