3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
