As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
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