As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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