I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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