does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
