white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
there's paper in my vomit.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
