Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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