would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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