He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
It was confusing and full of hummus
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize
