i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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