All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
