grandma shit on top of the toilet
I think im going to throw up on grandma
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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