That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
