it hurts more in the daytime
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize