Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
it hurts more in the daytime
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
