i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
