Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize