and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
