you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
