Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
