So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize