i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
