How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Randomize