I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
