I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
