THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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