let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
