he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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