I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Vodka?
Forever.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
