i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
