My cat gives me a boner
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
