Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
