So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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