I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
