Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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