Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
