i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
