is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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