Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Randomize
