yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
third nipple confirmed
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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