my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
it's not cheating when I paid for it
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
