i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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